France in two years.

Deleted all the conversations from my phone today to clear some space, and in them were the last messages I received from two friends who died this past year and I can’t bring myself to delete them.

"Hey woman, wanna come share a bottle of wine at Vint off Frankfort ave….across from Volare."

and

"Aww, thank you. Yeah.. I had a meltdown on monday. I haven’t been taking very good care of myself and depression got the better of me.. You’ve mentioned that you’ve been better. What’s been going on with you lately?"

I didn’t reply to either of those last messages, I don’t reply to a lot of messages on accident and I dunno if I was busy or asleep or didn’t see them. And I know it’s stupid and doesn’t matter now but it makes me feel like shit.

Seeing them on my phone whenever I check my message has made me sick to my stomach all day.

I hope anyone battling with drug addiction gets the help they need. And despite obviously not being reliable for it in the past, I’m always here to talk.